There have been many times in the past when I have questioned the wisdom of keeping the blog public. We leave ourselves open for all to see, to judge, to comment upon. We share things here that other families would never share publicly, not out of a pursuit of fame or some sort of pointless internet notoriety, but because we know that many won't...and some MUST. If no one shares the truth about adoption, about the pain that can accompany it, the healing that can occur, and the challenges we face, then parents move into a huge life decision completely ill prepared. It is easy to view adoption as a fairy tale, as some sort of Cinderella Story which usually ends with the gavel pounding and a judge's proclamation of "They're yours!".
But the story does not end there, in fact, most often the true story is just beginning to reveal itself. In our case, that story has been one of wonder and loss, of beginnings and awakenings, and of hard truths that must be accepted. While many might not see it that way, we do view it as a partnership with God to do what we are called to do even when others consider us to be lacking in common sense and wisdom. Maybe even the public openness of our blog shows a lack of that wisdom, but every single time I think that, every time I question myself, God shows up and reminds me that really, this blog isn't ours at all...it is God's to do with it whatever is needed. I know to many of you who read often this will sound a little too "churchy", but when you have taken risks and an occasional pounding publicly, it is important to keep perspective. Also, I am fully aware that I have a choice about all of this. I guess what I am saying is that I choose to be in relationship with God, and that I have been asked by God repeatedly to allow ourselves to be laid bare before you all, regardless of the ridicule or negative comment that comes our way from time to time. This past week, I shared that I had removed a couple of comments because of their rude and unkind approach...but I want to make it clear that it was not because someone disagreed with me. It was one of those moments when I asked God again, "Is it time? Why am I doing this publicly and not privately blogging?"
The answer came as an incredible blessing that I simply have to share with you all, for it is too profound, too wonderful not to.
I wrote yesterday about our "new" beautiful van, the one we had been waiting for God to lead us to. Little did I know what else God had in store with all of this, and once again I am surprised at how firmly God expresses what is desired for our lives, and how crystal clear the answers are when they come. Please let me share the comment I received on the prior post from the current owners of our new van, for I feel it is an example of God working powerfully in not only our lives, but the lives of others. We are all woven together, whether we want to admit it or not, whether we are able to see it or not. God's ability to bind us to one another is simply breathtaking. Here, let me share:
Cindy, I feel so blessed after reading and being lead to your blog. To you and your beautiful family my last name may look familar.... Yep, I'm Thom's wife and the "previous" owner of this van that we jokingly nicknamed George. My husband found George not so long ago and fell in love upon first sight. He collects and works on cars in his spare time and I trust his judgement in anything he would make his family travel in. George was so well taken care of, was clean on the inside and out and ran like a charm. God provided this van to us in a time of need as our Ford Excursion broke only days before our family vacation.
Unfortunately due to the lack of space (Thom currently owns about 9 cars, most of which don't run yet) and to the fact that our Excursion is working again, we could not keep George. I was ready to let him go, as I am with most of Thom's cars :) but Thom wasn't so thrilled. We had already discussed that if it didn't sale on Ebay we would keep George for a while longer, especially because we are approaching a new chapter in our lives where his interior space could be useful. The last couple of days of the ebay auction Thom was disappointed, and somewhat happy, that no one was seeing the same beauty in George that he saw. With mixed emotions we went to bed without waiting for the auction to end, which isn't like Thom at all. He woke me up early the next morning to tell me George had been sold. We were glad, but a little sad as well as we knew George would be leaving us soon.
Then, an email came with a link to your blog. Gods plan suddenly became so clear. When Thom called me this morning to encourage me to read you blog, I could tell that his departure with George would be so much easier after hearing your story. We recently started the adoption process through the state of Texas and feel so blessed to have found your family and your blog. I look forward to meeting you and/or your husband as I'll be with Thom this weekend to deliver George. I also look forward to reading your blogs regarding adoption. I know God had such a greater purpose when your family won the bid.
Have a blessed day!
Blessings...abundance...and a name for our new van :-) George it will be! And the additional gift in all of this is that every time I put my key in George's ignition, I will be reminded of how God is still speaking, in so many different ways. A theme lately has been "risk", it is risky to be public, it is risky to make changes in your life, it is risky to trust and love others.
I think I'll opt for risk, after all, I don't really know how to do otherwise.
Can't wait to meet you, "George"! Your new family anxiously awaits, and your "Love Wins" sticker is waiting to be put in the back window...which for the LaJoy's is sort of your adoption certificate :-)
But the story does not end there, in fact, most often the true story is just beginning to reveal itself. In our case, that story has been one of wonder and loss, of beginnings and awakenings, and of hard truths that must be accepted. While many might not see it that way, we do view it as a partnership with God to do what we are called to do even when others consider us to be lacking in common sense and wisdom. Maybe even the public openness of our blog shows a lack of that wisdom, but every single time I think that, every time I question myself, God shows up and reminds me that really, this blog isn't ours at all...it is God's to do with it whatever is needed. I know to many of you who read often this will sound a little too "churchy", but when you have taken risks and an occasional pounding publicly, it is important to keep perspective. Also, I am fully aware that I have a choice about all of this. I guess what I am saying is that I choose to be in relationship with God, and that I have been asked by God repeatedly to allow ourselves to be laid bare before you all, regardless of the ridicule or negative comment that comes our way from time to time. This past week, I shared that I had removed a couple of comments because of their rude and unkind approach...but I want to make it clear that it was not because someone disagreed with me. It was one of those moments when I asked God again, "Is it time? Why am I doing this publicly and not privately blogging?"
The answer came as an incredible blessing that I simply have to share with you all, for it is too profound, too wonderful not to.
Cindy, I feel so blessed after reading and being lead to your blog. To you and your beautiful family my last name may look familar.... Yep, I'm Thom's wife and the "previous" owner of this van that we jokingly nicknamed George. My husband found George not so long ago and fell in love upon first sight. He collects and works on cars in his spare time and I trust his judgement in anything he would make his family travel in. George was so well taken care of, was clean on the inside and out and ran like a charm. God provided this van to us in a time of need as our Ford Excursion broke only days before our family vacation.
Unfortunately due to the lack of space (Thom currently owns about 9 cars, most of which don't run yet) and to the fact that our Excursion is working again, we could not keep George. I was ready to let him go, as I am with most of Thom's cars :) but Thom wasn't so thrilled. We had already discussed that if it didn't sale on Ebay we would keep George for a while longer, especially because we are approaching a new chapter in our lives where his interior space could be useful. The last couple of days of the ebay auction Thom was disappointed, and somewhat happy, that no one was seeing the same beauty in George that he saw. With mixed emotions we went to bed without waiting for the auction to end, which isn't like Thom at all. He woke me up early the next morning to tell me George had been sold. We were glad, but a little sad as well as we knew George would be leaving us soon.
Then, an email came with a link to your blog. Gods plan suddenly became so clear. When Thom called me this morning to encourage me to read you blog, I could tell that his departure with George would be so much easier after hearing your story. We recently started the adoption process through the state of Texas and feel so blessed to have found your family and your blog. I look forward to meeting you and/or your husband as I'll be with Thom this weekend to deliver George. I also look forward to reading your blogs regarding adoption. I know God had such a greater purpose when your family won the bid.
Have a blessed day!
Blessings...abundance...and a name for our new van :-) George it will be! And the additional gift in all of this is that every time I put my key in George's ignition, I will be reminded of how God is still speaking, in so many different ways. A theme lately has been "risk", it is risky to be public, it is risky to make changes in your life, it is risky to trust and love others.
I think I'll opt for risk, after all, I don't really know how to do otherwise.
Can't wait to meet you, "George"! Your new family anxiously awaits, and your "Love Wins" sticker is waiting to be put in the back window...which for the LaJoy's is sort of your adoption certificate :-)
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